an apology to all creative writing students

to be brutally honest, 

there were only a few people in my class that i could stand.

i almost transferred out for that very reason.
but things have changed.

i saw you in class, laughing with your friends.

i would have bet all my lifesavings that you had a perfect family.

i go home and read all these blogs,

and i see a different side of you.
the scared side, the lonely side, the insecure side, the broken side, the lost side, the scarred side,
and i realize just how hard we ALL have it.

i  thought i was the only one who could put on a brave face.

i look at the quiet girl in the back corner and remember the post i read last night,
was it her parents who went through that nasty divorce?

this is an apology to every creative writing student.

i'm sorry your health holds you back from doing all the things that you love, 

i'm sorry that you're a middle child,

i'm sorry you have nightmares you wish were true,

i'm sorry your dad has cancer,

i'm sorry you lost your best friend,

i'm sorry you were painted orange when you liked red better,

i'm sorry you had to replace your zipper.
i'm sorry you're scared,

i'm sorry you cry yourself to sleep at night,

i'm sorry your parents split up. 

i'm sorry you're scared to go home,

i'm sorry you have so many burdens to carry,

i'm sorry you still feel alone in a sea of people.
i'm sorry i don't say hi to you in the hallway.

but most importantly,
i'm so sorry that i judged you 
i had no right and i had no place.

please try and find a way to forgive me.